


Stay

by fire_andwolfsbane



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Making Love, Physical Abuse, Self Harm, Stiles doesn't die, Suicide Attempt, trigger warning
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-05-15
Updated: 2013-07-25
Packaged: 2017-12-11 22:41:34
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,132
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/804048
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fire_andwolfsbane/pseuds/fire_andwolfsbane
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Derek's clutching his son like the lifeline they both know he is to Derek.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

 

No one stopped him. No one asked why he left school early today. He planned it like that. He knew if Allison was talking to Scott, he wouldn't notice his best friend leaving. He knew that if he smiled at Isaac, like he always did, he wouldn't spend another second picking on himself. Stiles knew that calling Erica a name would result In their normal banter while Boyd sat on and looked stoic. 

He knew no one would notice. And that's how he found himself In the bathroom of his house with his ADD meds, a switch blade and the last air of hope washing out of him.  His note placed perfectly on his pillow. 

He takes the pills first. All 24 of them. One by one until his mouth is dry and his hands are empty. He stands, a bit shaky and makes his way towards his bed room. Lying on his bed. The room is dizzy the lights are fuzzy but Stiles is still alive so he closes his eyes. The knife trembling with his spinning fingers. His heart is beating too fast. The first cut he makes is unintentional. He can't steady his hands and the knife lands right beside his major vein. He tries again though ignoring the blood already pulsing out. Pushing past the sting. He cuts now with Intent to die. His veins gushing out blood like a water fall. "I'll die now." He thinks before his vision goes spotted. He closes his eyes and breaths.

<<<<>>>>>

 

Sheriff and Derek pull up at the Stilinski house neither of them without a smile. They've been talking about baseball since they got off work. Sheriff and Derek get out the car. Laughing about something that happened in last nights game. 

 

"Do you really think he's a better-" Derek starts and John opens the door to his house. Derek's hit with pungent smell. His eyes flash red. A low growl escapes his lips before he pushes himself in front of his boyfriends father. His claws are extended as he takes a tentative step inside. He give the sheriff a glance warning him to stay right there. He taps his leg three times giving him the code for wolfsbane gun, instead of the normal bullets. Derek tenses at the steps. It smells vaguely of Stiles, like he was here recently. But that can't be Derek thinks because Stiles was at school. He skips steps following his nose before he gets curious. He steps Into the bathroom his boots sounding too loud even though his heart beat is through the roof. "Stiles." he whispers. The bathroom is clean except for the empty bottle of Add pills left in the counter. And Derek could swear he just bought those last week. He turns around bracing his hands on the door. Everything is off to him. The smell up here is stronger. Of blood yet Derek doesn't smell an Intruder. This house just smells of him, Stiles and the sheriff with a hint of Scott, and blood, lots and lots of blood. He steps into Stiles's room. His body frozen to the core. His fist clench and he growls. Bounding across the room to his boyfriend. "Sheriff!" He cries "Sheriff!" He's clenching Stiles so tight tears falling down his face. He cursing colorfully now. His head buried in Stiles' neck. Sheriff runs up the stairs wolfsbane bullet in hand. Aimed and ready to protect what's his.

 

"Derek." He says slowly moving the gun. 

 

"Derek what's going on?"

 

"We need to save him." Is all he gets. And that's when he sees his son wrapped in Derek's arms bleeding out. His voice cracks but he's moving fast. He rips off a piece of the covers and wraps it around the wounds pressing hard. Derek's trembling but won't let go of the boy no matter how hard John tries to get better access to his own son. 

 

"We need to go to a hospital." John says voice hoarse. They're already down the stairs. He hears Stiles try to speak but Derek's pressing soft kisses to his sons head telling him to wake up. And please don't leave him. John can't do this. He wants to break down. But he can't. He can't let Derek see what happens when things get bad. He has to be strong until they get to the hospital and the the doctors decide... The verdict. He'll cry then. He'll shout and break things and drink bottles of whiskey. But until then. He has to stay strong. 

 

"Stay." He hears Derek whisper to Stiles from the backseat. He's crying still; pressing the wounds to his lips trying to take the pain away. John doesn't even notice when they arrive at the hospital he just knows that he turns off the sirens, and gets out the car sated. It feels like he's walking through fog. Derek's clutching his son like the lifeline they both know he is to Derek. There's muffled screams in the waiting room. A nurse turns to look with horror picking up her phone.  

 

" What happened sir?" He hears her Ask frantically. Sheriff steps outside of himself. That's what it feels like. And out of body experience. 

 

"He, he tried, he, killed himself." 

 

"Is there a heart beat sir?" She Asks glancing from Derek to John. Derek growls low enough for John to hear. 

 

"Yes." He says. 

They follow another nurse. John thinks it might be Ms. McCall. Down hallways and corridors. Through door after door like a maze, until they find a room. Doctors are trying to pry Derek off his son but he won't budge. He's screaming at them holding Stiles close to him. John knows he doesn't trust doctors. "Son." He says placing a steady hand to his shoulder. Derek calms standing up and hugging john tightly, crying Into his shoulder. Muttering out Stiles name. All sheriff can do is grip his shoulder just as tight. 


	2. Silence

_Dad, you've always been there for me. Always strong and secure. You loved me even when I did some pretty stupid things. You chastised me and yelled only because you cared. I see that now. But I don't want to be the reason why you hurt. I got you fired and you still loved me, forgave me. I put you in danger time after time and you still put up with my stupidity. I don't want that anymore. I want you to be safe. I want you to have a peaceful life. And if taking me. Foolish, clumsy, no good Stiles out will help. Then that's what I'll do. This isn't good bye. It's just see you later; when your time comes which is a hundred years down the line. Don't rush to see me Dad, I'll be fine, I'll be in heaven with mom. I'm sorry I wasn't the kid you wanted me to be. I'm sorry I messed up your life. Don't worry I won't have the chance to do that any more. Be nice to Derek._

_Derek. I'm not a hero. I saved you because I loved you. Always have, always will. That's why I'm leaving.  I don't want you to have to put up with me. You need someone who doesn't challenge you, someone who doesn't test your limits. I'm a pest and you deserve better. I'm worthless and somewhere deep in your heart you know it. You always say I burned down your walls and broke open the windows  to your heart, but that wasn't me. That was Kate. She showed you who you were, and then destroyed you. I don't want to hurt you any more. I'm not strong enough for the both of us. I'm sorry. Derek don't cry for me. Let me go. I was never right for you. I'm just Stiles. Nobody important. I love you. I do. I know you'd be the one to pull some Edward Cullen shit. Don't okay. Don't miss me, don't mourn me. Don't remember me. Move on from me. Find a pretty girl that makes you forget who I am, who I was._

_Scott, Allison, Isaac, Boyd and Erica. Keep going okay. Don't ask yourselves what you could've done. Cause it's nothing. Nothing you guys could have done would have stopped me. Maybe prolonged the process, but you couldn't have stopped this. I know Erica and Boyd will be strong they'll be the glue to hold you all together. But Scott and Isaac. I don't want you guys to miss me. I want you to help the others. I want you Scott to help Derek. I know you hate him whatever. But could you for me just help him get over me._

_I don't know what else to say you a were my anchors keeping me here. I was finally able to break the chains. I'm not a hero._

<<<<>>>>

John sits at the edge of his sons bed. A glass of whiskey in one hand, the note in the other. Tears spilling down his face. He doesn't know what he's done to make his son feel this way about himself, but whatever it is, John promises himself that if Stiles wakes up, he'll do his best to prove him wrong. His son is a hero. It's John who's not. 


	3. Please

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> That's how they find him- The nurses and sheriff- his hand clasped with the boys. Dried tears clinging to him. Knees on the floor.

"Can you tell I haven't slept very well?"  Derek Asks. The cup of coffee In his hand has long been cold. He takes a small sip and grimaces. 

 

"I, Stiles. Damn." He runs a hand through his unkept hair, and closes his eyes, keeping his tears locked in. "You know I'm not good with these things, with words and that's maybe why you- why you did this. But Stiles you shouldn't ever doubt that I love you. I adore you. You are literally the air I breath. I can't even brush my hair. I spend more time than normal thinking about you. Loving you. God I sound so cheesy, but if you need to hear how much I love  you, Stiles I'll write you a letter every day to remind you." 

The tears he'd been trying to hold back came rushing down. "Fuck Stiles. I don't know why you think leaving me was an option!" Derek says his voice getting louder. "You said Stiles, the first thing you told me, when I got my head out of my ass, was that I'd be yours forever. You told me I'd never get rid of you. Fucking Stiles you told me- you fucking quoted John Green." He knocks over his chair, dropping his coffee in the process. "Shit." he says, sitting up the chair. "Stiles they're going to make you talk to a counselor, they're going to give you anti depressants, put you on suicide watch. Tell me I can't see you. I need you. I need you." Derek stands a little dropping to his knees and reaching out for Stiles' hand. Tears still sliding down his unshaven face. 

 

That's how they find him- The nurses and sheriff- his hand clasped with the boys. Dried tears clinging to him. Knees on the floor. Sheriff feels bad for waking him. But when Stiles starts to stir he shakes Derek's shoulders and helps him stand. 

"Hey son." Sheriff says to Derek. "We have to leave before he wakes up. He's meeting with a counselor today. One from the school, Ms. Morrell." Derek shakes his head at that. He remembers when Stiles saw her. "Lets go grab some coffee." He says gripping his shoulder and leading out the door. 

 

"Derek." Says a voice from behind them. Small and broken. 

"I'm sorry." He says.

"I'll try to fix this." Derek whispers without turning back. He fiddles with his necklace before closing the door.

 

 

<<<<>>>>

 

 

 

He hears the clicking of her heels before she's even in the building. He sees her long black hair glide past him before he's finished with his 3rd cup of coffee. He waits patiently  for and hour. Until she comes out again. She doesn't show any signs of a good session but then again there's no way to make a therapy session about suicide good. He stands up ignoring the look of curiosity on sheriffs face. He walks A few steps until he's In front of her. She looks confused for a second until realization dawns on her.

"I can't tell you what we've discussed." She states almost remorsefully. "I know," he replies looking Anywhere but at her. "But can you tell me how he's doing. If he, if he-"

"He still loves you Derek. He feels guilty. He feels, selfish." That's all she says before smiling slightly and brushing her hand down his shoulder. She walks aways in a blur of hair And clicking heels. 

 

" I need you," Derek says when stiles is asleep that night. "We need you." 

"Please."

 

**Author's Note:**

> I'm sorry I am. I was having a rough night and this was my outlet. Stiles hasn't died. This is the outcome of song promts and emotions.  
> In beta'd


End file.
